![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
xantissaFull archive of my stories is here on LJ and here IJ
Spoilers: possible for Fai's past.
Little Fai/Ashura
PG
Care
"It’s okay, Fai, shhh,” murmurs the king as he holds the shivering child close to his chest, not caring that his expensive robes will be dirtied.
The blond child just presses closer, cheeks damp with tears and sweat.
“It’s okay. It’s only magical backlash. Your body is too small to deal with it yet. I didn’t know. I’m sorry.” Ashura-oh whispers softly, still patiently stroking the boy’s head.
The boy only presses closer, shivering until sleep claims him. He whispers something against the smooth skin on the raven haired king’s neck, but the king doesn’t hear the child.
Fai/Ashura
PG-13
Disappointment
Ashura-oh stares, for the first time in his life speechless. Surprise and sadness are waging war in his eyes as he stares at the young man in front of him. Tall, almost as tall as the king himself. Huge blue eyes are still as vulnerable as they were yesterday, the hair soft and messy, curling in unruly strands around the young man’s face.
“Fai.” He whispers brokenly. Yesterday he held the sick, ten year old child in his arms, tiny and weak like a newborn kitten. Now there’s a man in his twenties standing before him with anxious eyes.
“Why?” He asks, even though he already knows the answer.
The man looks down, unsure, anxious and utterly vulnerable. “I didn’t want to be a disappointment again.”
Ashura-oh closes his eyes. The love in his heart mixing with the pain he always feels while looking at the child promised to him so long ago. He does the only thing he can. It’s already too late. Fai had cast away his childhood simply because of what the king said. He pulls the mage into his arms and hugs him tightly, the larger but still painfully thin frame feeling so utterly wrong.
“You are not. You were never a disappointment, Fai. Never.”
Fai/Ashura
PG-13
Worry
The young mage enters the main hall with a smile on his face and a sparkle in his eyes. The raven haired king watches him silently from the throne, his fingers resting lightly on the carved wood. His emotions masked by the impenetrable ice of his expression.
“I did it. I killed the monster.” Fai announces, arms flailing wildly, not caring of the dark, copper stains on his white coat. Blood, Ashura-oh thinks.
The king raises abruptly, his expensive robes rustling from the sudden movement. The tall, powerful figure descends the three steps that separate him from his mage. Fai never stops talking, relating the tale with expansive hand gestures and exaggerated sound effects.
The dark stain is the only thing the king sees, though. It’s small, not more that a paper cut would produce. But Ashura-oh can smell more. Much more.
‘Did you think I wouldn’t notice? That you could hide it from me?’ He thinks as he stops in front of his mage. And his mask must be slipping, because the young blond is now watching him warily, his words becoming quieter suddenly.
The slap echoes around the audience hall like an explosion. Everyone stills, watching wide eyed as the mage presses one pale hand to his rapidly darkening cheek.
“Arhura-oh...” He whispers pleadingly, his eyes wide and vulnerable, scared.
The king’s face is a frozen mask, perfect and cold.
“You could have died; you risked your life for such a trivial matter.” The anger felt like bloodlust, turning his vision red. The king’s face freezes even more in an effort to keep the rage inside.
“But...” Fai stammers, surprised, shocked at his king's reaction. “The monster was killing villagers! It needed to be stopped!”
“There are soldiers.” Ashura-oh states coldly.
“Many would have died!” Fai protest. He’s not from Ceres, but he loves this world and its people with his whole heart.
The king narrows his eyes and says, so quiet that only Fai can hear him.
“I don’t care about them.” He doesn’t need to say more. Fai’s lips part and his eyes widen even more, still so young and painfully vulnerable.
The king turns away sharply; his long hair arching in the air and almost slapping Fai in the face again. The blond mage stares at the retreating king, heart pounding, blood rushing in his ears.
Fai/Ashura
PG
Love
Fai presses his lips to the king’s in a hasty, dry kiss. He’s nervous, scared and more than a little lost.
The king watches his wide, blue eyes, the pale, perfect skin flush and the thin hands flutter at his sides. The chamber is dark, the only light coming from the fireplace.
The mage is scared, embarrassed but more than determined to see this through. A beautiful young man. Ashura-oh still remembers the bitter, scared and lost child in filthy rags staring at him from among of a sea of decaying corpses. He sees the unspoken question, the innocent invitation in Fai’s eyes.
He reaches for the blonds face and slowly leans closer, pressing his lips to the smooth forehead in a gentle, lingering kiss. He pulls the robe back around Fai’s shoulders and then sits back.
The mage’s eyes are big, round, swimming with emotions. He’s pale now, the flush abruptly gone from his cheeks. The rejection destroying some of the innocence inside him.
Ashura-oh sits on his bed, quiet and still as he watches Fai leave his bedroom.
I love you Fai, he thinks with the same mix of pain and gentleness he feels every time he looks at the blond mage.
Fai/Ashura, Fai/OC implied
PG
Choices
Ashura-oh watches his mage flirt, watches him watch the young Count with interested eyes. His face is still and cold, no emotions seeping out.
He watches the Count flirt, seduce the mage. Watches as Fai follows the Count willingly out of the ballroom, cheeks flushed and eyes burning with something Ashura-oh has only seen once, directed at him.
He catches the look Fai throws him before leaving
Are you watching? The blue eyes seem to ask.
Ashura-oh lifts his goblet with extra care, making sure his fingers don’t snap the delicate crystal. He wonders about choices and the price that one has to pay for his wishes.
People see him as strong, as powerful. But he’s not. He knows that after the party he’ll go to one of his concubines. The one that’s tall and thin, with messy blond hair, blue eyes and barely any curves on her body.
Fai/Ashura
PG-13
Rage
The raven haired king stands on the spacious balcony of his private chambers and watches the executioner raise the whip again in the main plaza. There’s a man kneeling in the center of it, his back a mess of cuts already. Stripped of title and lands, he pays the price for crossing the line.
The door to his chambers are thrown open with considerably more force than a person Fai’s size should be capable of and Ashura-oh is almost amused at the expressions on his guard's faces. Fai can do whatever he pleases, and everyone in the palace knows it.
“Ashura-oh!” Cries the dishelmed mage, and the king wonders absentmindedly just who let the blond know what was going on at the palace. Well, it wasn’t like Ashura-oh didn’t expect it at some level. He just wished they would be over with the punishment before the mage arrived. “What are you doing?! Why?!” the mage cries out distraught.
Ashura-oh keeps his eyes locked on the plaza as his hand shoot’s out and catches the surprised blonde’s wrist. He pulls that hand towards himself and raises it until the wide, fur trimmed sleeve falls away revealing the dark, vivid, purple bruises.
He looks at the suddenly very still Fai and raises his fingers to the blonde’s face. His fingertips brush the cool skin breaking the masking spell and revealing the black eye.
Fai is utterly still, like a small animal staring in the eyes of a dangerous predator.
“Did you think I wouldn’t notice?” Ashura-oh asks almost gently, his hand still tightly closed around Fai’s thin wrist.
The blond licks his dry lips, but says nothing.
He doesn’t understand, the king thinks bitterly, he still doesn’t understand that I love him.
“I will kill him for marking you.” He looks into the wide, blue eyes. “You will only ever carry my mark.” He thinks of the tattoo, a bond that will last between them for all eternity. “No one will ever mark you.”
Fai’s cheeks are wet with tears and his eyes are no longer as wide or as innocent as they used to be. “Please, let him live.”
The blond curls his fingers in the luxuriously embroiled robes and he presses his face into the king’s neck, like he used to do when he was still small. His warm breath licking the king's neck in moist puffs.
Ashura-oh closes his eyes and lets his arms come around the still too thin figure. He whistles sharply and a magical bird, a white dove, appears in front of him. Like a light arrow it shots down towards the plaza and the prisoner.
The king holds the shivering mage and thinks that he would give him anything, everything he asked for.
But the mage never asked for anything, never wanted anything but what Ashura could not give without hurting Fai even more.
How can I pay for something I haven’t even done yet? The king thinks sadly, the pain and love in his heart no longer two separate emotions.
EDIT: this series of ficelets/drabbles is now called Mirros, you can follow next installments through the tag
Spoilers: possible for Fai's past.
Little Fai/Ashura
PG
Care
"It’s okay, Fai, shhh,” murmurs the king as he holds the shivering child close to his chest, not caring that his expensive robes will be dirtied.
The blond child just presses closer, cheeks damp with tears and sweat.
“It’s okay. It’s only magical backlash. Your body is too small to deal with it yet. I didn’t know. I’m sorry.” Ashura-oh whispers softly, still patiently stroking the boy’s head.
The boy only presses closer, shivering until sleep claims him. He whispers something against the smooth skin on the raven haired king’s neck, but the king doesn’t hear the child.
Fai/Ashura
PG-13
Disappointment
Ashura-oh stares, for the first time in his life speechless. Surprise and sadness are waging war in his eyes as he stares at the young man in front of him. Tall, almost as tall as the king himself. Huge blue eyes are still as vulnerable as they were yesterday, the hair soft and messy, curling in unruly strands around the young man’s face.
“Fai.” He whispers brokenly. Yesterday he held the sick, ten year old child in his arms, tiny and weak like a newborn kitten. Now there’s a man in his twenties standing before him with anxious eyes.
“Why?” He asks, even though he already knows the answer.
The man looks down, unsure, anxious and utterly vulnerable. “I didn’t want to be a disappointment again.”
Ashura-oh closes his eyes. The love in his heart mixing with the pain he always feels while looking at the child promised to him so long ago. He does the only thing he can. It’s already too late. Fai had cast away his childhood simply because of what the king said. He pulls the mage into his arms and hugs him tightly, the larger but still painfully thin frame feeling so utterly wrong.
“You are not. You were never a disappointment, Fai. Never.”
Fai/Ashura
PG-13
Worry
The young mage enters the main hall with a smile on his face and a sparkle in his eyes. The raven haired king watches him silently from the throne, his fingers resting lightly on the carved wood. His emotions masked by the impenetrable ice of his expression.
“I did it. I killed the monster.” Fai announces, arms flailing wildly, not caring of the dark, copper stains on his white coat. Blood, Ashura-oh thinks.
The king raises abruptly, his expensive robes rustling from the sudden movement. The tall, powerful figure descends the three steps that separate him from his mage. Fai never stops talking, relating the tale with expansive hand gestures and exaggerated sound effects.
The dark stain is the only thing the king sees, though. It’s small, not more that a paper cut would produce. But Ashura-oh can smell more. Much more.
‘Did you think I wouldn’t notice? That you could hide it from me?’ He thinks as he stops in front of his mage. And his mask must be slipping, because the young blond is now watching him warily, his words becoming quieter suddenly.
The slap echoes around the audience hall like an explosion. Everyone stills, watching wide eyed as the mage presses one pale hand to his rapidly darkening cheek.
“Arhura-oh...” He whispers pleadingly, his eyes wide and vulnerable, scared.
The king’s face is a frozen mask, perfect and cold.
“You could have died; you risked your life for such a trivial matter.” The anger felt like bloodlust, turning his vision red. The king’s face freezes even more in an effort to keep the rage inside.
“But...” Fai stammers, surprised, shocked at his king's reaction. “The monster was killing villagers! It needed to be stopped!”
“There are soldiers.” Ashura-oh states coldly.
“Many would have died!” Fai protest. He’s not from Ceres, but he loves this world and its people with his whole heart.
The king narrows his eyes and says, so quiet that only Fai can hear him.
“I don’t care about them.” He doesn’t need to say more. Fai’s lips part and his eyes widen even more, still so young and painfully vulnerable.
The king turns away sharply; his long hair arching in the air and almost slapping Fai in the face again. The blond mage stares at the retreating king, heart pounding, blood rushing in his ears.
Fai/Ashura
PG
Love
Fai presses his lips to the king’s in a hasty, dry kiss. He’s nervous, scared and more than a little lost.
The king watches his wide, blue eyes, the pale, perfect skin flush and the thin hands flutter at his sides. The chamber is dark, the only light coming from the fireplace.
The mage is scared, embarrassed but more than determined to see this through. A beautiful young man. Ashura-oh still remembers the bitter, scared and lost child in filthy rags staring at him from among of a sea of decaying corpses. He sees the unspoken question, the innocent invitation in Fai’s eyes.
He reaches for the blonds face and slowly leans closer, pressing his lips to the smooth forehead in a gentle, lingering kiss. He pulls the robe back around Fai’s shoulders and then sits back.
The mage’s eyes are big, round, swimming with emotions. He’s pale now, the flush abruptly gone from his cheeks. The rejection destroying some of the innocence inside him.
Ashura-oh sits on his bed, quiet and still as he watches Fai leave his bedroom.
I love you Fai, he thinks with the same mix of pain and gentleness he feels every time he looks at the blond mage.
Fai/Ashura, Fai/OC implied
PG
Choices
Ashura-oh watches his mage flirt, watches him watch the young Count with interested eyes. His face is still and cold, no emotions seeping out.
He watches the Count flirt, seduce the mage. Watches as Fai follows the Count willingly out of the ballroom, cheeks flushed and eyes burning with something Ashura-oh has only seen once, directed at him.
He catches the look Fai throws him before leaving
Are you watching? The blue eyes seem to ask.
Ashura-oh lifts his goblet with extra care, making sure his fingers don’t snap the delicate crystal. He wonders about choices and the price that one has to pay for his wishes.
People see him as strong, as powerful. But he’s not. He knows that after the party he’ll go to one of his concubines. The one that’s tall and thin, with messy blond hair, blue eyes and barely any curves on her body.
Fai/Ashura
PG-13
Rage
The raven haired king stands on the spacious balcony of his private chambers and watches the executioner raise the whip again in the main plaza. There’s a man kneeling in the center of it, his back a mess of cuts already. Stripped of title and lands, he pays the price for crossing the line.
The door to his chambers are thrown open with considerably more force than a person Fai’s size should be capable of and Ashura-oh is almost amused at the expressions on his guard's faces. Fai can do whatever he pleases, and everyone in the palace knows it.
“Ashura-oh!” Cries the dishelmed mage, and the king wonders absentmindedly just who let the blond know what was going on at the palace. Well, it wasn’t like Ashura-oh didn’t expect it at some level. He just wished they would be over with the punishment before the mage arrived. “What are you doing?! Why?!” the mage cries out distraught.
Ashura-oh keeps his eyes locked on the plaza as his hand shoot’s out and catches the surprised blonde’s wrist. He pulls that hand towards himself and raises it until the wide, fur trimmed sleeve falls away revealing the dark, vivid, purple bruises.
He looks at the suddenly very still Fai and raises his fingers to the blonde’s face. His fingertips brush the cool skin breaking the masking spell and revealing the black eye.
Fai is utterly still, like a small animal staring in the eyes of a dangerous predator.
“Did you think I wouldn’t notice?” Ashura-oh asks almost gently, his hand still tightly closed around Fai’s thin wrist.
The blond licks his dry lips, but says nothing.
He doesn’t understand, the king thinks bitterly, he still doesn’t understand that I love him.
“I will kill him for marking you.” He looks into the wide, blue eyes. “You will only ever carry my mark.” He thinks of the tattoo, a bond that will last between them for all eternity. “No one will ever mark you.”
Fai’s cheeks are wet with tears and his eyes are no longer as wide or as innocent as they used to be. “Please, let him live.”
The blond curls his fingers in the luxuriously embroiled robes and he presses his face into the king’s neck, like he used to do when he was still small. His warm breath licking the king's neck in moist puffs.
Ashura-oh closes his eyes and lets his arms come around the still too thin figure. He whistles sharply and a magical bird, a white dove, appears in front of him. Like a light arrow it shots down towards the plaza and the prisoner.
The king holds the shivering mage and thinks that he would give him anything, everything he asked for.
But the mage never asked for anything, never wanted anything but what Ashura could not give without hurting Fai even more.
How can I pay for something I haven’t even done yet? The king thinks sadly, the pain and love in his heart no longer two separate emotions.
EDIT: this series of ficelets/drabbles is now called Mirros, you can follow next installments through the tag
